trying to make me

Gah … this whole first week of January is just a royal pain in my ass. I get so tired of being asked about what resolutions I’ve made. Like it’s something I HAVE to do and woe to me if I don’t make some choices that are meant to change my life for the better.

Feh …

Winter is no time to be making ANY kind of life-changing decisions. It is the MIDDLE of what is obviously the nastiest part of the year and people are disgusted with everything about themselves and their lives. They can’t stand their own reflection in a mirror, much less the sight of their spouses lolling in front of the television watching EVERY-FUCKING-BOWL-GAME that’s being played. If they have at-home kids, they want to just stuff ’em in a closet and don a set of sound-muffling earphones. The screen their phone calls because they don’t want to talk – to anybody. Their bodies are the color and consistency of potatoes. Oh, not firm, fresh potatoes, but sloppy white mashed potatoes. All people want to do this time of year is crawl under the warm covers of their beds with a heating pad and a book.

Just me?

Whatever.

Still a bad time.

We are setting ourselves up to fail and my theory is backed up by the experts (don’t believe me? Do a Google for new years resolution failure) and most of us do it before the second week of January.

Sorry to harsh your New Year’s mellow.

How the Fuck Do You Title This …

They’re not mine to grieve over, my friends; I didn’t make time for them, even knowing how short it all is. I don’t deserve to share in the grief, but I DID love them and I WILL miss them.

Both such GREAT BIG parts of my life at different times, so much happiness taken from them and from being with them.

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Smoke and Mirrors

Things aren’t always what they seem, are they?

I walk around making jokes and being everybody’s back-up, but sometimes I’m the one who needs a shoulder and a good joke to make me forget what’s on my mind.

I’m NOT whining … I am fully aware of the fact that I don’t share much with people and when I do, it’s in the form of a joke or a rant to make them laugh. I am a comedian at heart. I’m just saying that sometimes it would be nice if someone would just ASK instead of waling in the door and starting in with their drama du jour.

Someone DID ask today and before I could even get an answer out, he just continued on with his own personal agenda – wanting my feedback, wanting my support.

Of course, I’m here for my friends and family, but just every once in a while … y’know?