studying stones

Feh … back to cold, shitty weather. That’s Wisconsin for ya, if you don’t like the weather, wait a minute, it’ll change.

This does nothing for my disposition folks, nothing at all. There are other things at play here, but the weather does contribute to my wanting to inflict pain on somebody or something.

As you can see, I’ve change the look of the place again, what do you think? Like it? I think it’s pretty. I’ll probably change it again in a month or so, so don’t get too comfortable ;).

So we beat the Cubs last night, but only by the skin of our ass. There was some good ball, but plenty of crap, too. I was actually screaming at the end when the bases were loaded at the bottom of the ninth and it looked as though Axford had reverted to his old butt-clenching glory. My God, it’s only APRIL, I swear, my head is gonna pop off before October.

If I’d have been in the dugout after the 5th, I’d have cuffed TPlush right upside his goofy lookin’ head. I am so over him. Gonzalez however, has redeemed himself a bit in my eyes after his spectacular suck during the Cards series.

Wrigley Field is so cool looking. I’d LOVE to see a Brewers game there.

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all the things i wanted

What the hell does it say about me that a few kind words from a complete stranger can have me sobbing like a three year old? Is my life really that pathetic? Or am I just feeling sorry for myself?

I really don’t think I feel sorry for myself on a regular basis, certainly no more than anyone else.

In all I am a lucky person and for all intents and purposed my dreams have all been realized.

Granted, I may have dreamed “little” by other peoples’ standards, but they were my dreams and when laid side by side next to what might have come of my life, the kind of person I could’ve turned out to be – and in my own eyes – I have been blessed.

I remember one night about twenty-seven years ago. BigD and I had been living together about four months and there was a possibility that I might be pregnant. At that point in my life I had thought – I had WISHED AND PRAYED – a thousand times that I was pregnant. Not with BigD’s baby, but with my previous husband’s baby.

Until that night, sitting alone in a little bitty rented house, with this man that I had fallen so completely in love sleeping in the other room, this man that made me realize that all the “men” that had come before were just so many practice runs, I was doing more than praying, I was begging and making deals with God.

I can’t remember all of the trades that I offered, but I do remember telling God that if he let me be pregnant THIS time, I would give one of my legs. There were other equally ridiculous offers and three weeks later, when I found out that I really WAS pregnant, those promises and deals faded from my memory as those types of covenants often do.

The years rolled on and I was blessed with not only a son, but marriage to the most wonderful man in the world and a daughter. I was granted so many wishes and given so many gifts – good friends, healthy happy children, jobs that I loved and most of all the continuing love of a good, good man.

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educated guess

I love what I do – really, really love what I do.

I do not however always love the people I work with.

A couple of weeks ago, a current client referred someone to me. What she wanted was very simple – a very close duplication of her current, free site.

I took a look at the site. Yup, I can do it.

Here is how much time it’ll take me (8hrs) and here is my quote (hourly w/a bit of a discount because she was referred by a current client).

Easy job.

She was tickled, so happy. Couldn’t wait to get started.

Sent me the money.

Sent me an email saying (paraphrased): “Oh BTW, I am a control freak.”

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